Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Wedding Bells Getting Close...

So on Saturday, I'll be marrying my husband (again). I left North Carolina this past Saturday and I'm spending the week at my parents house, since that's where the wedding is going to be held. Its nice because since we're already married, its like a lot of the pressure is off, and its hopefully just going to be a really great party with our families and really close friends. James will drive up here on Friday for the rehearsal. He's home alone in NC now.

Its so strange being apart this time. Its not like we've never been apart. But we had just started to settle into our husband-wife routine in our apartment, and now we're apart and its so strange. I'm guessing its probably a good sing that I'm feeling homesick for our little place. I guess that means that we're really settled. As soon as I got on the train this past Saturday to go to my parent's house, I immediately felt homesick. And then as the train drove through Quantico and a bunch of Marines got on board, I felt close to tears. I miss my husband. I miss my daily routine. I even mess picking up after him. I miss our evening routine of dinner, tv, talking, reading after he gets home from work. I just miss it. It is nice to be home with the family, its just the first time I've left my husband behind in our home. Maybe the reason this feels so strange is that I'm always the one being left behind, and this time I was the one doing the leaving. Hmmm... that's an interesting thought...

On a less melancholy note, my best friend from forever is coming home tomorrow to help get ready for the wedding. She's my maid of honor. We've been friends since we first danced together back when I was 10. We talk all the time, but lately we've only been seeing each other for 1 day once a year (if that). So I can't WAIT for her to be here tomorrow :) She's going to come over in the evening and then on Thursday she'll be here helping us cook (my mother is the caterer for this wedding... are we crazy? Yes probably, but I'll let you know how it goes) and then we'll go out to dinner and have a sleepover, like old times :) Its going to be a blast!

For now I just have to keep plugging away at my To-Do list, lots to do before Saturday, and hope that the next few days go by quickly. I can't wait to see my husband. And I can't wait to marry him again in front of all our family and friends :)

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The Field

So James left for the field this morning. Short trip though. Should be back tomorrow. He was saying last night that for so long they've just been sitting around doing nothing and now that he's married, BOOM... they're in the field all summer. Its true. But like I said, this one's not so bad. Just one night alone.

Small update on the 2nd bedroom. I went through a couple piles of papers and filed them all away. Progress. Very small progress. But still, progress.

So on Saturday I'm hopping on the train and going home to see my family and to help get ready for our wedding ceremony that we're holding at my parents house next weekend. We got married in a courthouse in May so that we could get all our paperwork taken care of. BAH and my military ID and all of that. But now we're going to have our 'real' wedding at my parents house with all of our family members and a few friends. I'm excited :) Both to see my parents and brothers, and also for the wedding. It's going to be super super low key. Pretty much just a big family picnic. But its going to be so much fun and I can't wait :) After that James took a whole bunch of leave and we're going to hang out at home for a little while, and then go to the beach for 5 days. I'm going to start planning our beach menu sometime this week. Growing up my mom made a lot of lists, and we had written weekly menus on the fridge. And whenever we went on vacation, well that menu planning was pretty intense. And you know what they say, like mother like daughter :) I'm lucky to have such a good role model!

So my week is mainly going to be made up of list making. Packing lists for me. A list of things I'll need James to bring up when he comes for the wedding. Last minute wedding planning to-do lists. And packing lists and menus for our beach honeymoon. Good thing I love lists!

Monday, August 2, 2010

The 2nd Bedroom

So our apartment has 2 bedrooms. When we got it we thought, "Oh that will be nice. We'll put this little loveseat with a fold out bed in there. And we'll put a computer desk in there. Use the closet for a little extra storage. It'll be a nice guest room/office"

Yeah right.

Our 2nd bedroom looks like a bomb went off in it. And when the bomb exploded gear and coats and random work out stuff and papers and bags of scarves flew everywhere. The first week we lived here I tried really hard to get it cleaned out and organzined, but gave up eventually. I just keep the door shut and pretend there's nothing behind it. But today. Today was different. I took a deep breath, opened the door, and dove in. (Literally. There's so much stuff in there it was really like diving into a pool. A pool of really random stuff)

I'd like to say that I pulled off a miracle and now the 2nd bedroom looks like the actual guest room/office we originally envisioned. But, sadly, there was no miracle. BUT, I did do a little organizing, wading through the various bits of Marine gear and heaving it all into somewhat manageable piles. You can now walk in the room, but you cannot relax in there on the loveseat. Or sit at the desk and use the computer. Its a step forward though.

So I'm setting this goal now. Before September 30th that room will look the way we want it to. (And I just made my husband 'pinky promise' to that goal) Slowly, but surely, we will do it.

Right now though, I'm going to pour myself a glass of wine and watch a little tv with my husband. Happy Monday :)

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Quiet rainy day...

There's something about a rainy Sunday. Especially a rainy Sunday following a Saturday night where I tossed and turned all night (for no real reason, just wasn't feeling so great) There's just a general feeling of laziness, and a disregard to the clock. I just looked at the clock for the first time a few minutes ago, and was shocked to see how late in the day its gotten!

I've been arguing with myself about whether or not I should feel guilty for a day like this. And really, yesterday was a day like this too (although we did run to the commissary) Should I be doing the dishes that are in the sink? Should I be making the bed? Dusting? Cooking something? Baking something? But the more I argue with myself, the more I realize I'm just being ridiculous. Is anybody judging me for enjoying a lazy weekend with my husband? I would hope not. And if they are, there's isn't an opinion I care about. My husband works hard all week doing his job. And I work hard all week doing mine. And this week was especially rough, what with him being sick and me substituting some ballet classes. We deserve days like this. At least I think we do anyway...

Sometimes, especially on days like these, I stop and look at James and I'm completely overcome with a feeling of comfort, safety, and happiness. Our dating relationship was always uncertain. When will I see you again? How long will you stay? Will you be available by phone this week? And now, (all of a sudden it seems), here we are. Its hard to believe that we've made it to this point. Now, I do know that, with him being a Marine and all, that uncertainty will never truly go away. But there's something so incredibly comforting about that fact that now, we're living in OUR apartment. Things are no longer 'mine' or 'his' they're just 'ours' I don't even know how much sense I'm making right now. I'm having trouble putting words to the exact feeling I have. The words I used before: 'comfort' 'safety' 'happiness' don't quite cover it. But anyway, I'll just put it this way. After 2 years of sporadic visits and tearful goodbyes, its incredibly nice to be able to spend lazy weekends together like this. Without the old nagging feeling of needing to ACCOMPLISH something before Monday rolled around. I used to try and fill our weekends with EVERYTHING I possibly could because I knew when the weekend was over he'd be gone and who knew when I'd see him again. It's incredibly calming to be able to just enjoy a weekend, with no looming deadline to meet...

Now my rambling could probably also be called stalling because after all that about having a lazy rainy Sunday, and deserving it, I do actually need to throw in a couple loads of laundry before we leave for the movie theater. I guess just a little work on a lazy day never killed anybody...