I've been using list making as a means to keep from going insane my whole life. And now, I need those lists more than ever. When I feel panicky about moving, or James' deployment, I pull out my notebook and pen and scribble down a list of some kind. Then I feel more in control, and can go back to whatever I had been doing. I guess there are worse things right?
To go back a few days.... the night that we found out Philip had been killed in Afghanistan, was the most upset I have ever seen my husband. It was a difficult evening for both of us. He came home from work and we both immediately lost control and sat on the couch for quite some time just holding each other and crying. Luckily Sam was content to play independently in his exersaucer and we were able to take time to gather ourselves together before putting him to bed. I had made a big crockpot full of chili and a pan of cornbread, but it sat un-eaten in the kitchen until much later that evening when James said, "You know, Phil would be pretty upset with us for letting food go to waste. He loved his food." We were able to laugh a little and eat dinner.
Our thoughts and prayers continue to be with his family during this difficult time, his funeral is going to be held in Texas this Saturday. We looked into how long the drive time will be, and how much plane tickets cost, but we're sadly not going to be able to make it. We'll be there in spirit though.
I've managed to get back to my planning and list making, as I said earlier in this post. Throwing myself into organizing and planning the next year for us, while stressful as anything, is really helping me right now. I have lists of possible apartments, lists of ideas for care package items and themes, lists of classes I'd like to sign Sam up for, lists of ways to keep Sam and James connected, lists of goals and projects I'd like to accomplish over the course of the deployment... lists and lists and lists.
I considered for a while starting up a new blog, to be used just during deployment, and the months leading up to it, but then I realized that this blog I have no has no specific purpose, so why not make it a deployment blog for a few months?
Yesterday I went to Target for a few things and, as always, wandered through the $1 section before visiting the rest of the store. I found some great, fun little things for James in there, and already have his first care package started! Once he's gone and I'm sending out my care packages, I'll post pictures here. I like the idea of doing themed care packages. He's going to be gone for a few important events and holidays that I'll send a themed care package for (our 2nd anniversary, family beach trip, Sam's 1st birthday, 4th of July, Labor Day camping trip, Halloween, Marine Corps Birthday, Thanksgiving...) but I have a few 'just for fun' themes as well.
Time seems to have gotten away from me here... Sam will be up soon from his nap, and I need to clean the master bathroom before he gets up and we go grocery shopping. I'll be glad to get out of the house for a while, I just wish it weren't so dreary and rainy (still) so that we could get out for a walk or something... hopefully we'll see some sun soon. Sam needs some fresh air! And so do I!
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Rest In Peace Marine...
Today is a hard day. We found out this morning that a friend of ours, who used to work with James, was KIA in Afghanistan. His wife had just moved back to NC and moved into their new home earlier this week, as he was due to come home in just a couple weeks.
Shock doesn't even begin to describe how I'm feeling right now. This is the first time a war casualty has hit so close to home.
I cannot imagine what his wife must be feeling right now. I literally can't let myself imagine it because I would fall apart.
The news of his death came only a week after James told me that his orders have changed and he will be going to Afghanistan this spring.
I'm feeling so many emotions right now. Sadness being the forefront, but fear tagging along right behind.
I almost feel bad, selfish, that in the midst of this family's sadness, I can't help but think about myself and my family.
I'm not stupid. I know that in war, people die. Until today, however, it didn't really seem real. Now all of a sudden, it feels like this could happen to us. All of a sudden this is something ugly that I need to face.
All day I've been looking at Sam and seeing his Daddy's face in all of his little features. How would I cope if all of a sudden I were a single parent? These are all thoughts that have crossed my mind before. Before I said 'yes' to marrying a Marine, these were things I needed to consider, but now they're all of a sudden not just thoughts to consider, but a very possible reality to face.
All I want to do right now is to curl up inside my husband's arms, but my heart aches when I think of my friend who would love to do the same thing, but can't and won't ever again.
This past week, I've been busy preparing for James' upcoming deployment. Finding an apartment for Sam and I in PA near my parent's house. Coming up with care package themes and ways to help Sam remember who Daddy is. Taking notes in a 5 subject notebook, making lists and keeping organized, telling myself that I'll come up with plenty of ways to make the time go by quickly.
I can't even look at that notebook now. I want to pretend that James isn't going anywhere. That we'll grieve our fallen friend together, but that we won't have to imagine this ever happening to us. But we can't do that. We need to face this. We've never really talked about this possibility because he was supposed to be starting a non deployable job that would last until the end of this enlistment. It wasn't on our radar. Since we found out that he's deploying, we've talked about how we will communicate, how he will stay in touch with Sam, where Sam and I will live, the logistics of moving, but we haven't mentioned what will happen if the worst should happen. After today, I know that it's something we need to talk about. Most likely, one of us will bring it up this evening.
It's hard when you have to face facts and realize that your worst nightmare is capable of coming true. I pray every single night that I will never have to face what my friend is facing right now. I pray every single night that Sam will never have to be without his Daddy.
And tonight I'll pray for the soul of a fallen hero, and for healing and love on his wife and family.
Rest in Peace Marine, and thank you for making the ultimate sacrifice.
Shock doesn't even begin to describe how I'm feeling right now. This is the first time a war casualty has hit so close to home.
I cannot imagine what his wife must be feeling right now. I literally can't let myself imagine it because I would fall apart.
The news of his death came only a week after James told me that his orders have changed and he will be going to Afghanistan this spring.
I'm feeling so many emotions right now. Sadness being the forefront, but fear tagging along right behind.
I almost feel bad, selfish, that in the midst of this family's sadness, I can't help but think about myself and my family.
I'm not stupid. I know that in war, people die. Until today, however, it didn't really seem real. Now all of a sudden, it feels like this could happen to us. All of a sudden this is something ugly that I need to face.
All day I've been looking at Sam and seeing his Daddy's face in all of his little features. How would I cope if all of a sudden I were a single parent? These are all thoughts that have crossed my mind before. Before I said 'yes' to marrying a Marine, these were things I needed to consider, but now they're all of a sudden not just thoughts to consider, but a very possible reality to face.
All I want to do right now is to curl up inside my husband's arms, but my heart aches when I think of my friend who would love to do the same thing, but can't and won't ever again.
This past week, I've been busy preparing for James' upcoming deployment. Finding an apartment for Sam and I in PA near my parent's house. Coming up with care package themes and ways to help Sam remember who Daddy is. Taking notes in a 5 subject notebook, making lists and keeping organized, telling myself that I'll come up with plenty of ways to make the time go by quickly.
I can't even look at that notebook now. I want to pretend that James isn't going anywhere. That we'll grieve our fallen friend together, but that we won't have to imagine this ever happening to us. But we can't do that. We need to face this. We've never really talked about this possibility because he was supposed to be starting a non deployable job that would last until the end of this enlistment. It wasn't on our radar. Since we found out that he's deploying, we've talked about how we will communicate, how he will stay in touch with Sam, where Sam and I will live, the logistics of moving, but we haven't mentioned what will happen if the worst should happen. After today, I know that it's something we need to talk about. Most likely, one of us will bring it up this evening.
It's hard when you have to face facts and realize that your worst nightmare is capable of coming true. I pray every single night that I will never have to face what my friend is facing right now. I pray every single night that Sam will never have to be without his Daddy.
And tonight I'll pray for the soul of a fallen hero, and for healing and love on his wife and family.
Rest in Peace Marine, and thank you for making the ultimate sacrifice.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Reflections and Resolutions
There are less than 48 hours left in 2011... whaaat? When did that happen? This year feels like it flew by. At the same time though, when I look back, New Years Eve last year seems like it was a whole different life! I guess, in a sense, it was a whole different life. Yes, I was pregnant, so I was sort of 'mommy' already, but my life didn't REALLY change until 6/7 when Sam came into the world. I thought it would be fun to post a little memory and picture from each month of 2011, and then I'll follow up with my resolutions and hopes for 2012 :)
January-
We found out that the little bean in my belly had boy parts. James left for South America. James' re enlistment paperwork did not go through properly and we went without pay for a few weeks :/ (not so fun when you're 20 weeks pregnant and your husband just left!)
February-
James was still in South America. I went to weekly lunch dates with the other wives from the platoon, and spent some fun days with my good friend (who was also pregnant) Nichole. At the end of the month I flew home to PA to visit family.
March-
Busy month! Had my baby shower and wrapped up my visit in PA, all of the baby shower gifts were left behind and my parents planned on driving them down to NC once we were in our new apartment. I prepared for James' homecoming, what an awesome day that was! We spent loooong afternoons/evenings packing up our small apartment. Towards the end of the month we headed out to Winston Salem for a Babymoon/post deployment mini vacation. We stayed at Graylyn Estate, very beautiful! We had a great time :)
April-
We moved into our new beautiful apartment! It was so fun getting Sam's nursery all set up. We went to a lot of baby prep. type classes. Lamaze, budgeting for baby, baby boot camp, stuff like that. I also took some pregnancy exercise classes at the gym on base. We went to a pig roast, and came home that night to huddle in our guest bathroom while toranados wreaked havok on Jacksonville. Eek!
May-
Lots of baby preparations. I was pretty much DONE being pregnant at this point. No, not the correct term 'finished', I was DONE. Stick a fork in me... done. It was hot, my back hurt, my ribs were bruised and had pinched nerves, heartburn, constant trips to the bathroom, exhaustion. Ugh. Whoever says pregnancy was one of the happiest times in their lives is kidding themselves! We spent a lot of weekends at the pool. Floating around FINALLY gave me some relief in my ribs and back! We went to the New River air show, got stuck in a couple major downpours, but had fun anyway. We had our 1 year anniversary and celebrated with a seafood dinner and Cold Stone.
June-
Finally! June! Time for the big event! Sam decided to join us on the 7th, only 1 week into June, but it felt like MONTHS into June. (I know that doesn't make sense, but I call it like I felt it!) After his traumatic entrance to the world, we went home and the rest of June is kind of a blur of 3am nursing sessions, diaper changes, and endless conversations involving the word 'swaddle'. James' parents came to visit for a long weekend when Sam was a week and a half old, and my mom came for a week shortly after they left.
July-
Started to find something of a sense of normalcy again (our new normal anyway), and cobbled together some sort of schedule. Sam and I had a lot of days of nursing and listening to music once James went back to work. I had my birthday and we celebrated with burgers and shakes from Andy's. I remember I ate my burger while nursing and got a lovely mixture of ketchup and mayo all over Sam. Whoops...
August-
Sam and I flew up to PA for a visit. We went to a wedding, a family reunion, had his first playdate, and did a whole lot of visiting. Sam did great with all of the travelling! In all honesty, it all really stressed me out, but I'm still so glad we went :)
September-
We went on our annual family camping trip with James' family over Labor Day weekend and had a blast. We hunkered down through hurricane Irene. James went to Florida for 10 days and Sam and I battled through some yucky sleep issues.
October-
Started using cloth diapers! Loving it! Went to work breaking Sam of his swing nap, and swaddle habit. Sam and I went home on a last minute, long weekend trip to PA for my Poppop's funeral. It was so sad, he was such a great man. But it was good knowing that his long period of suffering was finally over. It was also nice to get in a bonus visit with family, and a lot of people got to meet Sam for the first time.
November-
FINALLY broke Sam's swaddle and swing habit! And he started sleeping through the night! Woohoo! Drove up to PA for Thanksgiving, and Sam and I stayed a little longer while James went home for a few days. He came back and we went to his family's annual Christmas brunch.
December-
Spent just about a week and a half in Jacksonville, but still decorated our little tree, and our balcony. We left up all of our Christmas decorations and left behind a few presents so we could have our own quiet little Christmas once we got back from visiting family in the beginning of January. We spent a few days in MD with James' parents and then spent the rest of the holidays in PA. Lots of visiting, lots of food, and LOTS of presents!! We had a great time :)
What a year! What a great year :) Now onto some resolutions...
In 2012 I hope to:
-Start a fitness routine and stick to it
-Get something of my toned ballerina body back (don't feel the need to lose weight, but feel the need to tone up)
-Begin to make as many things homeade as possible
Examples: Bread, bagels, breakfast sandwiches, snacks, drinks, laundry detergent, cleaning wipes, baby wipes, oxy clean, household cleaners, hand lotion
-Organize!!
Examples: Hall desk, files, calenders, cleaning schedules, cabinets (kitchen and bath), Sam's toys
A whole lot of that stuff I'm hoping to accomplish with the help of pinterest ;)
Some of my hopes for 2012:
-For Sam to coninue growing and learning as awesomely as he is now
-For James to get enough time off that we can all enjoy a family vacation at the beach
-To get pregnant again?! It seems crazy to think of that, but unless something happens unexpectedly, we'd like to make a concious effort to try for baby #2 sometime in the Sept-Dec. 2012 time frame!
Here's to a great year!
January-
We found out that the little bean in my belly had boy parts. James left for South America. James' re enlistment paperwork did not go through properly and we went without pay for a few weeks :/ (not so fun when you're 20 weeks pregnant and your husband just left!)
February-
James was still in South America. I went to weekly lunch dates with the other wives from the platoon, and spent some fun days with my good friend (who was also pregnant) Nichole. At the end of the month I flew home to PA to visit family.
March-
Busy month! Had my baby shower and wrapped up my visit in PA, all of the baby shower gifts were left behind and my parents planned on driving them down to NC once we were in our new apartment. I prepared for James' homecoming, what an awesome day that was! We spent loooong afternoons/evenings packing up our small apartment. Towards the end of the month we headed out to Winston Salem for a Babymoon/post deployment mini vacation. We stayed at Graylyn Estate, very beautiful! We had a great time :)
April-
We moved into our new beautiful apartment! It was so fun getting Sam's nursery all set up. We went to a lot of baby prep. type classes. Lamaze, budgeting for baby, baby boot camp, stuff like that. I also took some pregnancy exercise classes at the gym on base. We went to a pig roast, and came home that night to huddle in our guest bathroom while toranados wreaked havok on Jacksonville. Eek!
May-
Lots of baby preparations. I was pretty much DONE being pregnant at this point. No, not the correct term 'finished', I was DONE. Stick a fork in me... done. It was hot, my back hurt, my ribs were bruised and had pinched nerves, heartburn, constant trips to the bathroom, exhaustion. Ugh. Whoever says pregnancy was one of the happiest times in their lives is kidding themselves! We spent a lot of weekends at the pool. Floating around FINALLY gave me some relief in my ribs and back! We went to the New River air show, got stuck in a couple major downpours, but had fun anyway. We had our 1 year anniversary and celebrated with a seafood dinner and Cold Stone.
June-
Finally! June! Time for the big event! Sam decided to join us on the 7th, only 1 week into June, but it felt like MONTHS into June. (I know that doesn't make sense, but I call it like I felt it!) After his traumatic entrance to the world, we went home and the rest of June is kind of a blur of 3am nursing sessions, diaper changes, and endless conversations involving the word 'swaddle'. James' parents came to visit for a long weekend when Sam was a week and a half old, and my mom came for a week shortly after they left.
July-
Started to find something of a sense of normalcy again (our new normal anyway), and cobbled together some sort of schedule. Sam and I had a lot of days of nursing and listening to music once James went back to work. I had my birthday and we celebrated with burgers and shakes from Andy's. I remember I ate my burger while nursing and got a lovely mixture of ketchup and mayo all over Sam. Whoops...
August-
Sam and I flew up to PA for a visit. We went to a wedding, a family reunion, had his first playdate, and did a whole lot of visiting. Sam did great with all of the travelling! In all honesty, it all really stressed me out, but I'm still so glad we went :)
September-
We went on our annual family camping trip with James' family over Labor Day weekend and had a blast. We hunkered down through hurricane Irene. James went to Florida for 10 days and Sam and I battled through some yucky sleep issues.
October-
Started using cloth diapers! Loving it! Went to work breaking Sam of his swing nap, and swaddle habit. Sam and I went home on a last minute, long weekend trip to PA for my Poppop's funeral. It was so sad, he was such a great man. But it was good knowing that his long period of suffering was finally over. It was also nice to get in a bonus visit with family, and a lot of people got to meet Sam for the first time.
November-
FINALLY broke Sam's swaddle and swing habit! And he started sleeping through the night! Woohoo! Drove up to PA for Thanksgiving, and Sam and I stayed a little longer while James went home for a few days. He came back and we went to his family's annual Christmas brunch.
December-
Spent just about a week and a half in Jacksonville, but still decorated our little tree, and our balcony. We left up all of our Christmas decorations and left behind a few presents so we could have our own quiet little Christmas once we got back from visiting family in the beginning of January. We spent a few days in MD with James' parents and then spent the rest of the holidays in PA. Lots of visiting, lots of food, and LOTS of presents!! We had a great time :)
What a year! What a great year :) Now onto some resolutions...
In 2012 I hope to:
-Start a fitness routine and stick to it
-Get something of my toned ballerina body back (don't feel the need to lose weight, but feel the need to tone up)
-Begin to make as many things homeade as possible
Examples: Bread, bagels, breakfast sandwiches, snacks, drinks, laundry detergent, cleaning wipes, baby wipes, oxy clean, household cleaners, hand lotion
-Organize!!
Examples: Hall desk, files, calenders, cleaning schedules, cabinets (kitchen and bath), Sam's toys
A whole lot of that stuff I'm hoping to accomplish with the help of pinterest ;)
Some of my hopes for 2012:
-For Sam to coninue growing and learning as awesomely as he is now
-For James to get enough time off that we can all enjoy a family vacation at the beach
-To get pregnant again?! It seems crazy to think of that, but unless something happens unexpectedly, we'd like to make a concious effort to try for baby #2 sometime in the Sept-Dec. 2012 time frame!
Here's to a great year!
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Proud Nursing Mama!!
Today I could not be more proud to be a breastfeeding mother! This morning Sam and I participated in a 'nurse-in', happening in Target stores all over the country!
This past November, a nursing mother in Houston, TX sat down in a remote area of her local Target's clothing section to nurse her crying baby. She was approached by employees and asked to move to a fitting room. She said no, as she had a cart full of items that she didn't want to leave alone, and had already begun nursing. After saying no, employees continued to walk up to her and give her dirty looks. One employee even went so far as to tell her that they could have her arrested for indecent exposure. Following the incident, the mother called Target's corporate office to report what had happened. Target has released this statement:
"Target has a long-standing practice that supports breastfeeding in our stores. We apologize for any inconvenience the guest experienced and will take this opportunity to reaffirm this commitment with our team members. For guests in our stores, we support the use of fitting rooms for women who wish to breastfeed their babies, even if others are waiting to use the fitting rooms. In addition, guests who choose to breastfeed discreetly in more public areas of the store are welcome to do so without being made to feel uncomfortable."
The TX mom decided to stage a 'nurse-in', a group of woman getting together on a specific day to nurse their babies in public. She started a group on Facebook and as of today, that group has 6,622 memebers! Nurse-ins were planned all over the country for today (Dec. 28th) at 10am.
Yes, Target's policy is to allow women to breastfeed where and when they choose, but this isn't the first incident of mistreatment of a nursing mother at Target. And CERTAINLY not the first incident of mistreatment of a nursing mother at any public location. The point of the nurse-in was to show people that nursing is normal. No woman should be made to feel like she needs to hide when she's simply meeting her baby's most basic need! Would the fitting room have been more comfortable for this woman? Possibly. But I know, from personal experience, that once you begin nursing it's inconvenient to un latch your baby, move to a different location, and re latch. Difficult with a newborn who is just getting the hang of nursing, and difficult for older babies who are easily distracted by their surroundings. Some comments on articles I've read say that the biggest problem is that the woman should not have been sitting on the floor, and maybe she was in the way. Would there have been an issue had she been bottle feeding on the floor? I don't think there would have been. And really, in my opinion, her incident was just the last straw in a long line of incidences of breastfeeding woman being discriminated against.
It is entirely possible to breastfeed in a modest way! Even without a cover! (For the record, the woman who started the nurse-in, was covered by a large blanket while nursing). Sam does not tolerate a cover well, and actually draws MORE attention to himself when covered, so we nurse uncovered. Most of the time I don't even think people notice that he's eating.
Myself and one other mama went to a local Target (in Glen Mills, PA as we're visiting my family for the holidays. Otherwise I would have gone in NC to the Target near our apartment) We spoke with 2 local news stations, and then sat in the cafe nursing our babies and chatting. A lot of people are still very uneducated as far as breastfeeding, but it is my hope that someday in the near future, Mom's will be able to nurse their babies without fear of discrimination.
I'm proud to be a nursing mother and proud to be able to provide the very best nutrition for my baby boy!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Tis the Season!!
Currently sitting in my Dad's recliner, Sam is napping upstairs in my brother's room where we have been sleeping the past week, and James is in NC for a few days. He'll be back up here tomorrow. I love love LOVE this time of year! And it's just so much more fun with a baby to spoil and teach all the traditions to!
Thanksgiving was a wonderful day :) Sam didn't really nap all day, but was a pretty cheerful baby anyway! I let him gnaw on some carrot sticks so that he felt part of the day. He loved it! He is lunging more and more at our food, the other day he basically threw himself at a bowl of pasta I had. It made a mess! Next week, when we get back to NC, we'll be starting our BLW journey and I can't wait! I'll be sure to post how it goes, with pictures too :)
Sam's sleep continues to be great! His naps have been all over the place since we've been up in PA since we've been so busy. Napping in his car seat, the stroller, the Moby wrap, in my arms on the recliner, wherever he can! His nights have been awesome though! I'm up to give him a binky 1-2 times a night, which really isn't too bad since I wake frequently to check on him anyway. He's been waking up between 6 and 7, but then after entertaining himself for 15 minutes or so, goes back to sleep til almost 9!! I don't even know what to do with that! My allergies are giving me hell, otherwise I would be so ridiculously rested! Hopefully he'll keep this up when we're at home and I can get some awesome sleep in my own bed!
Yesterday I think Sam was playing catch up for all the days of missed naps. He woke up around 8:45, and was back down for a nap around 10:30. I woke him up at 12:30 and then he had to just have catnaps the rest of the afternoon as we were running errands, but he managed an hour long 'catnap'! Then he fell asleep sitting with me around 6:30, so I took him upstairs, put his pjs on, nursed him, and put him to bed. He slept (with 1 wake up for a binky) til 8:45! And went down for this nap around 10:30. It's almost 11:30 now and he's still sleeping away! Catching up for the naps he skipped recently, or going through a growth spurt. Either way, it's nice!
Today, after Sam gets up and we both have lunch, my mom and I are taking him to the mall to have his picture taken with Santa :) James is kind of bummed to be missing out on that, but I still want to take him to the Annapolis mall Santa, and the Jacksonville mall Santa as well! Maybe I'm a little crazy, but I really love Christmas!
My theme for Christmas gifts this year? Pinterest! I am so obsessed with that website! I'm getting such awesome ideas from it for homeade gifts. Not to mention all kinds of ideas for homeade cleaners, and all kinds of home decor ideas. I have so many projects for after Christmas. I want to start making everything homeade as I possibly can. Food, cleaners, decorations, anything I can! I'm excited to start all of that, but with all the travelling we're doing this holiday season, I figured it would be best to start in January.
Talking about Pinterest makes me realize I haven't actually visited the site in a few days, so I'm off to do that now! :) Yay pinning!
Thanksgiving was a wonderful day :) Sam didn't really nap all day, but was a pretty cheerful baby anyway! I let him gnaw on some carrot sticks so that he felt part of the day. He loved it! He is lunging more and more at our food, the other day he basically threw himself at a bowl of pasta I had. It made a mess! Next week, when we get back to NC, we'll be starting our BLW journey and I can't wait! I'll be sure to post how it goes, with pictures too :)
Sam's sleep continues to be great! His naps have been all over the place since we've been up in PA since we've been so busy. Napping in his car seat, the stroller, the Moby wrap, in my arms on the recliner, wherever he can! His nights have been awesome though! I'm up to give him a binky 1-2 times a night, which really isn't too bad since I wake frequently to check on him anyway. He's been waking up between 6 and 7, but then after entertaining himself for 15 minutes or so, goes back to sleep til almost 9!! I don't even know what to do with that! My allergies are giving me hell, otherwise I would be so ridiculously rested! Hopefully he'll keep this up when we're at home and I can get some awesome sleep in my own bed!
Yesterday I think Sam was playing catch up for all the days of missed naps. He woke up around 8:45, and was back down for a nap around 10:30. I woke him up at 12:30 and then he had to just have catnaps the rest of the afternoon as we were running errands, but he managed an hour long 'catnap'! Then he fell asleep sitting with me around 6:30, so I took him upstairs, put his pjs on, nursed him, and put him to bed. He slept (with 1 wake up for a binky) til 8:45! And went down for this nap around 10:30. It's almost 11:30 now and he's still sleeping away! Catching up for the naps he skipped recently, or going through a growth spurt. Either way, it's nice!
Today, after Sam gets up and we both have lunch, my mom and I are taking him to the mall to have his picture taken with Santa :) James is kind of bummed to be missing out on that, but I still want to take him to the Annapolis mall Santa, and the Jacksonville mall Santa as well! Maybe I'm a little crazy, but I really love Christmas!
My theme for Christmas gifts this year? Pinterest! I am so obsessed with that website! I'm getting such awesome ideas from it for homeade gifts. Not to mention all kinds of ideas for homeade cleaners, and all kinds of home decor ideas. I have so many projects for after Christmas. I want to start making everything homeade as I possibly can. Food, cleaners, decorations, anything I can! I'm excited to start all of that, but with all the travelling we're doing this holiday season, I figured it would be best to start in January.
Talking about Pinterest makes me realize I haven't actually visited the site in a few days, so I'm off to do that now! :) Yay pinning!
Friday, November 18, 2011
Bliss!
I'm a little scared to jinx anything by saying this... but I THINK our sleep situation has been resolved! Our daily routine now looks something like this:
9:30 (ish)- Change Sam's diaper, give him a binky, lay him in his crib on his tummy, pat his butt for a little while, leave the room. Go get him about 2 hours later.
2:30 (ish)- Same as above, except it often doesn't last quite 2 hours, but I'm not stressing.
7:30- Nurse Sam in the rocker
8 (ish)- Lay him in his crib on his side.
7:30 (ish)- Go in and say good morning to his smiling face!!!!
Some nights I do have to go in and give him a binky once or twice, but some nights I don't go in at all. And when I do go in, he just needs the binky, not even any patting or shushing.
It's AMAZING to feel rested! Not to mention, knowing he'll nap somewhat consistently has been so great for my sanity! Even on days where I don't accomplish much, it's just nice to get a break twice a day! Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my little boy, but a Mama needs a break sometimes! There's only so many times in a day you can wipe slobber off your arm/face/shirt/ear/hands/etc... and sing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider"!
Oh and another breakthrough? Often, when either James or I goes to check on Sam at various times throughout the evening before we go to bed, he is often sleeping peacefully on his back! He always wakes up on his tummy and clearly that's his preferred way of sleeping, but I love knowing that he'll sleep on his back without that stupid swaddle! AND it's such wonderful peace of mind knowing that he can flip back and forth in his sleep! I don't feel QUITE so worried about winning the worst mommy of the year award for letting him be a tummy sleeper. Our little boy really is growing up, it's hard to belive that in just a couple weeks he'll be 6 months old!
Speaking of his 6 month birthday, I'm still doing research on Baby Led Weaning. The more I read, the more excited I am to get started! Sam is started to show more and more interest in watching us eat, and often grabs at our food. He's also starting to sit up pretty well on his own, and is awesome at grabbing and picking things up. I think he's about ready! My BLW book recommends starting with a variety of foods so that baby can learn about different tastes and textures. I definitely want to start with some broccoli because it sounds like a great BLW food, it has it's own handle :) Probably also some avocado and sweet potato. It's crazy that he's so grown up now...
In other news... we went to Myrtle Beach last weekend and had a blast! The Marine Corps Ball was a good time, and Sam was a huge hit in his baby dress blues :) We also went to the aquarium and did some outlet shopping. This weekend James is in the field til Tuesday so it's just Sam and I at home. Then on Wednesday we head to PA for Thanksgiving! James has to leave on Saturday while Sam and I will stay for a while, he'll be back on Thursday though and we'll spend a little time in MD before going back up to PA for a Christmas brunch with his family. While in MD we're hopefully going to stop in on a couple of Nutcracker rehearsals. I'm excited to see my friends and some of my old students :)
A few pictures, (including some of the professional ones that we just got the other day! So excited to buy some frames and hang these suckers up!) and then I'm back to my 'Friends' marathon and ignoring the 4 loads of laundry that need folding... I tend to take a day 'off' when James leaves for the field hehe ;)
9:30 (ish)- Change Sam's diaper, give him a binky, lay him in his crib on his tummy, pat his butt for a little while, leave the room. Go get him about 2 hours later.
2:30 (ish)- Same as above, except it often doesn't last quite 2 hours, but I'm not stressing.
7:30- Nurse Sam in the rocker
8 (ish)- Lay him in his crib on his side.
7:30 (ish)- Go in and say good morning to his smiling face!!!!
Some nights I do have to go in and give him a binky once or twice, but some nights I don't go in at all. And when I do go in, he just needs the binky, not even any patting or shushing.
It's AMAZING to feel rested! Not to mention, knowing he'll nap somewhat consistently has been so great for my sanity! Even on days where I don't accomplish much, it's just nice to get a break twice a day! Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my little boy, but a Mama needs a break sometimes! There's only so many times in a day you can wipe slobber off your arm/face/shirt/ear/hands/etc... and sing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider"!
Oh and another breakthrough? Often, when either James or I goes to check on Sam at various times throughout the evening before we go to bed, he is often sleeping peacefully on his back! He always wakes up on his tummy and clearly that's his preferred way of sleeping, but I love knowing that he'll sleep on his back without that stupid swaddle! AND it's such wonderful peace of mind knowing that he can flip back and forth in his sleep! I don't feel QUITE so worried about winning the worst mommy of the year award for letting him be a tummy sleeper. Our little boy really is growing up, it's hard to belive that in just a couple weeks he'll be 6 months old!
Speaking of his 6 month birthday, I'm still doing research on Baby Led Weaning. The more I read, the more excited I am to get started! Sam is started to show more and more interest in watching us eat, and often grabs at our food. He's also starting to sit up pretty well on his own, and is awesome at grabbing and picking things up. I think he's about ready! My BLW book recommends starting with a variety of foods so that baby can learn about different tastes and textures. I definitely want to start with some broccoli because it sounds like a great BLW food, it has it's own handle :) Probably also some avocado and sweet potato. It's crazy that he's so grown up now...
In other news... we went to Myrtle Beach last weekend and had a blast! The Marine Corps Ball was a good time, and Sam was a huge hit in his baby dress blues :) We also went to the aquarium and did some outlet shopping. This weekend James is in the field til Tuesday so it's just Sam and I at home. Then on Wednesday we head to PA for Thanksgiving! James has to leave on Saturday while Sam and I will stay for a while, he'll be back on Thursday though and we'll spend a little time in MD before going back up to PA for a Christmas brunch with his family. While in MD we're hopefully going to stop in on a couple of Nutcracker rehearsals. I'm excited to see my friends and some of my old students :)
A few pictures, (including some of the professional ones that we just got the other day! So excited to buy some frames and hang these suckers up!) and then I'm back to my 'Friends' marathon and ignoring the 4 loads of laundry that need folding... I tend to take a day 'off' when James leaves for the field hehe ;)
Thursday, November 10, 2011
236 Years! (And of course, more on sleep...)
First things first! Happy 236th Birthday to the United States Marine Corps! I'm proud everyday to be the wife of one of the Few and the Proud. Tomorrow morning we'll be heading down to Myrtle Beach for the weekend. The 2nd Tank Battalion's Marine Corps birthday ball is on Saturday. Sam and I will get dressed up (Sam has mini dress blues... I will definitely be posting pictures!) for the cocktail hour, and then heading back to up to the hotel room for bedtime while James attends the ceremony and dinner before joining us. Then on Sunday we're going to take advantage of some outlet shopping on our way home :) Very excited for our first little vacation as a family! We have gone on trips before; Sam and I have flown to PA together twice, and we all went camping together with James' extended family over Labor Day, but this is our first trip just the 3 of us. We're really looking forward to it!
So, now that all of that is out of the way, I can talk about our major sleep breakthrough! My last post, I talked about my conflicted feelings on letting Sam sleep on his tummy. After some research, and a lot of talking to other mommies, I've come to the conclusion that if he can roll to his tummy himself then why make him sleep in a way that's not comfortable for him. He seems to love sleeping on his tummy. Does it make me paranoid about SIDS? You bet. Am I figuring out ways to deal? I have to! I'm currently on the market for an Angelcare monitor. It has a sensor pad that goes underneath the mattress, and an alarm will go off if it detects no movement for 20 seconds or more. By movement, I don't just mean twitches and rolls and big movements like that, but even just the subtle rise and fall of Sam's chest as he breathes. It would grant me so much peace of mind! I'm just shopping around right now to find the best price. SO here's my usual recap of naps.... (listing them by actual name of day now since I can't remember what number day we're on)
Monday
Nap 1- Fell asleep on his own in his crib, on his tummy. Woke after about 45 minutes, fell back to sleep with some butt patting
Nap 2- More of the same
Tuesday
Nap 1- Same as Monday
Nap 2- didn't happen... we were at the local high school where I was hired as a dance choreographer for the colorguard, tryouts were this week. Sam slept a little in the car on the way home.
Wednesday
Nap 1- Fell asleep on his own in his crib, on his tummy. Slept straight through til I went to wake him 2 hours later :)
Nap 2- At tryouts again, took a catnap in the Moby wrap while I danced
Thursday
Nap 1- Fell asleep on his own in his crib, on his tummy. Slept an hour, needed some butt patting, slept another hour and a half
Nap 2- not there yet... hopefully it will go well!
So I'd say tummy naps are going relatively well! The swing is gathering dust in the corner! Now, nighttime. After Monday's tummy naps, I still wasn't feeling comfortable enough to let him sleep all night on his tummy. So, after his last feeding, I swaddled him as usual. Since he has never made an attempt to roll while swaddled, only when he's managed to free his arms, I felt pretty comfortable doing this. I woke up sometime around 3 am with a sudden urge to go to Sam's room and check on him. And there he was, on his tummy, and completely swaddled! This made me very nervous! No hands to help lift his face off the mattress if needed! I was torn between letting him sleep since he looked so peaceful and his head was safely turned to the side, or pull his arms out and inevitabely wake him up and piss him off. I went back to bed and left him as is. I then proceeded to toss and turn for a good 45 minutes, went back to the nursery, and pulled out his arms. He didn't wake all the way up right then, but it definitely got him out of the deep sleep he had been in. He woke a little while later to nurse. After nursing, I kept him unswaddled and laid him in his crib on his side. He stayed asleep til about 7:30and woke all the way on his belly!
At this point, I knew it was time to quit the swaddle cold turkey. I didn't want him rolling while swaddled anymore. So when bedtime rolled around on Tuesday, I put him in a wearable blanket-type thing to keep him warm, but kept his little arms out. He nursed in the rocker as usual, and I set him down on his side in his crib. This was around 8. A little after 1 I heard him on the monitor, went in, gave him his binky and he went immediately back to sleep. We repeated this 2 more times around 4 and 6, but he never woke up all the way to nurse, I never had to get him out of his crib, and I was never out of bed longer than 5 minutes!! I consider that sleeping through the night! Last night? Same thing! I know now that he doesn't really need to eat in the night. Now if I can just get him to settle himself without me giving him his binky and patting his butt a couple times, we'll be all set! So that's our next task, and I can go for it full of energy since I've been getting so much sleep! :) So yay!
Next time, hopefully pictures from the ball!
So, now that all of that is out of the way, I can talk about our major sleep breakthrough! My last post, I talked about my conflicted feelings on letting Sam sleep on his tummy. After some research, and a lot of talking to other mommies, I've come to the conclusion that if he can roll to his tummy himself then why make him sleep in a way that's not comfortable for him. He seems to love sleeping on his tummy. Does it make me paranoid about SIDS? You bet. Am I figuring out ways to deal? I have to! I'm currently on the market for an Angelcare monitor. It has a sensor pad that goes underneath the mattress, and an alarm will go off if it detects no movement for 20 seconds or more. By movement, I don't just mean twitches and rolls and big movements like that, but even just the subtle rise and fall of Sam's chest as he breathes. It would grant me so much peace of mind! I'm just shopping around right now to find the best price. SO here's my usual recap of naps.... (listing them by actual name of day now since I can't remember what number day we're on)
Monday
Nap 1- Fell asleep on his own in his crib, on his tummy. Woke after about 45 minutes, fell back to sleep with some butt patting
Nap 2- More of the same
Tuesday
Nap 1- Same as Monday
Nap 2- didn't happen... we were at the local high school where I was hired as a dance choreographer for the colorguard, tryouts were this week. Sam slept a little in the car on the way home.
Wednesday
Nap 1- Fell asleep on his own in his crib, on his tummy. Slept straight through til I went to wake him 2 hours later :)
Nap 2- At tryouts again, took a catnap in the Moby wrap while I danced
Thursday
Nap 1- Fell asleep on his own in his crib, on his tummy. Slept an hour, needed some butt patting, slept another hour and a half
Nap 2- not there yet... hopefully it will go well!
So I'd say tummy naps are going relatively well! The swing is gathering dust in the corner! Now, nighttime. After Monday's tummy naps, I still wasn't feeling comfortable enough to let him sleep all night on his tummy. So, after his last feeding, I swaddled him as usual. Since he has never made an attempt to roll while swaddled, only when he's managed to free his arms, I felt pretty comfortable doing this. I woke up sometime around 3 am with a sudden urge to go to Sam's room and check on him. And there he was, on his tummy, and completely swaddled! This made me very nervous! No hands to help lift his face off the mattress if needed! I was torn between letting him sleep since he looked so peaceful and his head was safely turned to the side, or pull his arms out and inevitabely wake him up and piss him off. I went back to bed and left him as is. I then proceeded to toss and turn for a good 45 minutes, went back to the nursery, and pulled out his arms. He didn't wake all the way up right then, but it definitely got him out of the deep sleep he had been in. He woke a little while later to nurse. After nursing, I kept him unswaddled and laid him in his crib on his side. He stayed asleep til about 7:30and woke all the way on his belly!
At this point, I knew it was time to quit the swaddle cold turkey. I didn't want him rolling while swaddled anymore. So when bedtime rolled around on Tuesday, I put him in a wearable blanket-type thing to keep him warm, but kept his little arms out. He nursed in the rocker as usual, and I set him down on his side in his crib. This was around 8. A little after 1 I heard him on the monitor, went in, gave him his binky and he went immediately back to sleep. We repeated this 2 more times around 4 and 6, but he never woke up all the way to nurse, I never had to get him out of his crib, and I was never out of bed longer than 5 minutes!! I consider that sleeping through the night! Last night? Same thing! I know now that he doesn't really need to eat in the night. Now if I can just get him to settle himself without me giving him his binky and patting his butt a couple times, we'll be all set! So that's our next task, and I can go for it full of energy since I've been getting so much sleep! :) So yay!
Next time, hopefully pictures from the ball!
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