My 11/8 due date came and went with no baby, despite feeling really sure the entire week leading up to my due date that something was going to happen at any moment. Go back and read my other birth stories though, I think I say that in every single one. The end of pregnancy reminds me of distance running. There is definitely a lot of physical endurance necessary to get through, but it's also so much a mind game! I didn't feel too discouraged about going past my due date though because that day I woke up feeling awful with a pretty bad cold. I was absolutely miserable the whole weekend. I don't remember the last time I was quite that sick! I was struggling to breathe just while sleeping, the thought of trying to labor while feeling that way made me panic. So I just concentrated on resting and recovering.
By Monday I felt slightly more human and then by Tuesday I felt more like my self (albeit very, very pregnant at the end of what had been a particularly exhausting pregnancy). I had an ultrasound appointment with a midwife follow up scheduled for Friday, when I'd be 41 weeks, but I was hoping not to have to go. At that point I was feeling sporadic contractions, but nothing worth timing. I was also feeling a lot of pressure. It was that feeling of pressure when I woke up on Wednesday, 40 weeks 5 days and the most pregnant I'd ever been, that prompted me to call the on call midwife and ask if I could please just come in for a check. I needed to know if what I was feeling was doing anything. I was feeling incredibly anxious because my last labor, with Anna, had progressed so strangely. Bev, one of my favorite midwives at Birth Care, was on call and told me to come in and she would see what was going on. I called my mom and she came over so she could sit in the car with the kids while I ran in for a check.
At the birth center Bev and I talked about my labor with Anna and what I had been feeling the past few days. Then she checked me and said I was 4cm and about 80-90% effaced. I felt a huge wave of relief wash over me. Something was going on. I asked her if she could do a sweep and she did. Before I left she gave me a long, tight hug and told me, "Soon. You're almost there." which obviously made me cry. I went back out to the car and my mom and I took the kids to Target and out to lunch. While walking around I was feeling a lot of pressure and every now and then a little contraction. Mostly I just felt tired. At home that afternoon I just laid down while the kids watched a movie and then I heated up soup my mom had dropped off earlier that week for dinner. At dinner and bedtime I felt like I was going to wake up disappointed and pregnant the next morning. I looked at James and said, "I. Just. Want. To. Have. A. Baby." Then while I was nursing Anna and putting her to bed I felt a couple stronger contractions that gave me pause and I started to hope a little bit. I rushed myself off to bed once the kids were all in bed because I was so exhausted and wanted to sleep some first if I was going to go into labor. I fell asleep some time between 9 and 9:30.
Around 11 I had a contraction strong enough to wake me up. It was the first contraction I'd had that required a little breathing so I assumed things were getting going. I tried to go back to sleep though since nothing consistent was happening. Between 11 and 12 I dozed off and on and had maybe 2 or 3 more contractions that required my attention. Right around midnight I had a contraction that I didn't want to lay down through, so I got up to breathe through it and opened up my contraction timer app. I woke James up to tell him labor was starting, and told him to go back to sleep, I'd wake him when they were closer. I went down and put on an episode of Downton Abbey and sat on the couch to time my contractions. They were about 10-12 minutes apart and I was very grateful to see that they were holding their pattern instead of being all over the place like they had been when I was in labor with Anna. By the time the episode was over I wasn't able to sit through the contractions anymore and I was swaying in front of the tv. At that point I figured we'd probably need to head to the birth center before the kids woke up. The game plan for that was for my dad to stay at the house with them while my mom went to the birth center with me and James. Then my dad would bring the kids in the van once they woke up. Not able to focus on a show like Downton anymore, I put on The Office as background noise and started moving around the house. I put away some clean dishes and tidied up the kitchen, laid out clothes for all of the kids, packed bags with toys for Anna and Henry, got out the snack basket I had put together a few days prior, just sort of generally did busy work and chores while my contractions started to space more like 6-7 minutes apart.
Around 2am my contractions were more like 5 minutes apart so I woke James up and called my parents to come over. I called the birth center and spoke with the on call midwife, Myra, who told me she and another midwife were already there and to come whenever I was ready. James and I gathered our things and got dressed and my contractions were coming more like every 4 minutes and getting significantly stronger. I started to feel like things were moving pretty fast and felt a sense of urgency, but still thought my dad would certainly be bringing the kids over once they woke up around 7, so I wrote him a quick note about shoes and jackets and things like that while we waited. Once my parents walked in the door my sense of urgency was even more heightened and I could tell my mom and James were feeling it too. We quickly said goodbye to my dad and got into 2 cars. I went with my mom and James brought his truck. My parents would need 2 cars to get the kids back home after my dad brought them in the van later, so James and I could bring the baby home in the van. The logistics of getting everybody safely to and from the birth center in the correct car seats had been plaguing me for weeks to be honest!
Pause for a contraction on the way out to the car.
On the way to the birth center, about halfway there (it takes between 15 and 20 minutes to get there) I had a long, strong contraction that left me sweaty and anxious. I had one moment of panic right then. I've given birth enough times to know what it feels like when transition comes and know my body enough to know when it's getting ready to push a baby out soon. My mom later told me that she had a moment of panic at the same time because she's watched me give birth enough times to know how my breathing changes when we're getting to the end. And James later said he had that same exact moment of panic following behind my mom's car when she noticeably sped up.
We arrived at the birth center right around 3am. I jumped out of the car as fast as I could when we got there as I was feeling another contraction and contracting sitting in the car is my least favorite thing ever. I breathed through that contraction while James rushed over from his truck to rub my back and my mom got my bags. I made it the 10 steps to the front door before having to stop for another contraction. Myra had seen us pull in and had come outside to stand with me for that one. When it passed she told me to go into the little bedroom they call "triage" and she'd do a quick check. I had 2 contractions, very strong, before she could do that. Baby's heartbeat sounded great on the doppler and Myra said I was 9cm. She went to make sure a birthing room was ready and told me she'd be right back. I got up from the bed when she left and another super strong contraction came, but with this one I felt my body start to push. As soon as the contraction faded I told my mom and James that my body was pushing and right after that Myra came in, but I was contracting again. She could tell from how I looked and sounded what was going on and told me we could totally stay right there in that room or we could try to go back to a birthing room. The little room was plenty comfortable with a regular bed and everything, but it was pretty tiny and I wanted to try to get to the other room. I made my way as quickly as I could around the corner and down the hall, contractions just piling on top of each other at this point. I had to stop right outside the room and really felt my body pushing and had to vocalize through the contraction for the first time. Myra was standing next to me, quietly telling me I could keep going or stay. She has the most calming voice and I was so grateful for it! I made it the last couple steps into the bedroom and immediately grabbed the edge of the bed. With that contraction I felt very distinctly the baby move way down and some burning. When that contraction passed I said, "Uhhhh, the baby is coming. Right now." and then my water broke.
Myra, still in her wonderfully calm and quiet voice, told me I could stay standing right where I was, or she would help me up onto the bed if I would be more comfortable. I told her I wanted to be on all 4s on the bed. I knew getting on all 4s would relieve some of the pressure I was feeling in my lower back, and it would be easier to get comfy once the baby was out. I needed a lot of help to get up on the bed and I was struggling mentally at this point. I think I said something along the lines of, "This is the part I don't like." (meaning that panicky, transition, "I just can't do this" part). I was also so very, very tired. Once I was up on the bed everybody helped pile a bunch of pillows under my head and I started pushing and breathing down into contractions and sort of falling asleep on the pillows in between. I could definitely feel the baby coming down, but my energy was so zapped. I didn't say anything, but Myra could tell I was exhausted, so she suggested I lay down on my side to be in a more restful position. I said I wanted that very much, but needed a lot of help. Myra, James, and the nurse were able to get me onto my side and James helped me hold one leg up. As soon as I laid down I felt the baby right there and with the next contraction I felt familiar crowning feelings without consciously pushing. At that moment I felt so. freaking. strong. all of a sudden and I pushed right into that crowning feeling until I knew the baby's head was out. Once baby's head was out I felt the most immense relief, both physically and mentally, but still had to dig really deep to get baby's shoulders and chest out. That's never been an easy part for me or my babies, and this time was no different, but out they came and I reached down and pulled my baby up to snuggle into my chest at last! It was 3:33, only a half an hour after we walked in the doors of the birth center, and only 3 and half hours after I got out of bed!
You can see the contraction in this picture
He just continuously tells me, "You're doing it. You're doing so good." right in my ear and it's exactly what I need to hear.
Baby!
For the first time ever, I remembered to ask if we had a boy or a girl. I've always had to be reminded to check in the past! James looked and announced to the room that we had a baby girl and I said, "It's Julia! Hi Julia! Hi baby girl!" I so love that moment of greeting our new baby by their name for the first time!
Eventually the placenta was delivered and the cord cut, Myra said I didn't need any stitches (a first for me!) and everybody helped me get from laying onto my side to sitting propped up with pillows and Julia latched on. The nurse who had been there the whole time finally had a chance to say hello and introduce herself at that point! She took quick vitals from us and she and Myra left us alone to repeatedly exclaim to one another, "I can't believe how fast that went!" and to discuss that moment when all 3 of us had thought I was about to deliver a baby on the side of the road in front of an Amish farm. That would have been quite a birth story!
Noting the time, we knew I'd be discharged and we'd be heading home around 7:30, so there was no point in my dad even bringing the kids. My mom warmed up some food she had brought for us and then went back to our house to bring back the van with Julia's car seat. James and I just ate and talked and gazed at our beautiful baby girl. The nurse came back in to weigh and measure Julia. She was 8lbs 3oz and 20.5oz, making her our 2nd smallest baby. My mom got to hold her for a little bit while I showered and got dressed and we all hung out for another hour or so before getting Julia dressed and heading home! I immediately put my new Christmas cd into the van's cd player since I had been holding myself back from listening to Christmas music only until the baby came.
Beautiful mural in our birthing room. Beautiful tub too, but there definitely wasn't time for the tub!
Ready to go home!
At home Kate came running up to me first, looking so sweet in her messy braid and nightgown. I went over to the couch and everybody else came running too. They had all flip flopped between thinking we were having a boy or a girl, but most recently they had all firmly agreed that they were getting a brother. Luckily nobody was upset to be wrong and they were very excited to have another sister. Everybody petted her and examined her, my mom and dad headed home, I ate some more, and then Julia and I went upstairs to nurse and sleep while James and the big kids watched Moana. And that pretty much sums up the past couple days! Napping and nursing and movies (thanks Disney+ for your timely release!)
I still can't quite wrap my head around how fast everything went, but I am so grateful that it did. I truly did not have the mental or physical energy in me for anything longer! My recovery has been very smooth and easy so far and Julia is nursing and sleeping great. We had our home visit today and she is actually already an ounce over her birth weight!
We're now looking forward to more quiet, slow days soaking up this tiny new member of our family and are so excited to be celebrating this holiday season as a family of 7!
